Creating the Right Impression with Body Language
While most of us work hard to make a positive impression on others, it’s important to know that certain types of body language send a negative message. However, it isn’t always easy to control our gestures, as many of them are involuntary. Many times, we are not even aware of our own body language; therefore, we don’t focus on controlling it.
Since body language movements tend to reinforce our feelings, we are responsible for minimizing any negative effects that our actions may produce. While we may have control over the words we speak, we can’t always control the message our body language is conveying. To begin with, it is important for us to be aware of what messages our facial expressions may be sending to others, as body language instead of words is frequently responsible for igniting a conflict.
First of all, if you hold objects in front of your body, others may see you as trying to separate yourself. This translates into you being unapproachable. On the other hand, you do not want to stand too close to a person. If you do, some people may feel uncomfortable. You want to respect other people’s personal space. A good rule of thumb is to allow 4 square feet of space surrounding them.
People tend to think you are being sarcastic if you look up toward the ceiling while they are talking. They see it as a dismissive attitude, or that you are putting them down. Rolling your eyes has about the same effect. You don’t want to look down either. Some people may take it as disinterest, but others will be even more insulted and label you as being arrogant. Bobbing your head while someone is talking to you also sends the message that you have no interest in what they are saying. No matter which of these behaviors you show, the other person is going to be hurt or insulted.
Sighing while someone is speaking is just as bad. No one wants to think that they are boring you. Checking your watch is rude, as it shows you have no respect for the person talking. Imagine how it must feel to have someone insinuate that he or she has something more important to do than to listen to you.
You should always make eye contact with someone whom you know. While it’s always nice to smile, don’t fake it. If your smile isn’t genuine, people are going to know. A truly warm smile shows on your entire face, particularly the eyes. If only your lips smile, you might as well forget it. People aren’t going to like you any better.
Bear in mind that the way you stand, sit, and walk can command respect from others. Posture affects how even strangers respond to you. Keep your head up and your shoulders pulled back. You will both look and feel more confident. Pushing the shoulders forward is usually seen as a sign of weakness because it makes a person look smaller.
Even the way in which you hold the palms of your hands can have either a positive or a negative effect on others. Open palms are a sign of honesty in cultures worldwide. The practice dates back to the Stone Age when people would show that their hands were empty and held no weapons. Closed palms give others the impression that a person is controlling and wants to tell them what to do.
What you do with your arms and legs when you sit matters as well. Sitting with your arms folded and legs tightly crossed tells people that you feel either uncomfortable or defensive. In some cases, people may see you as being cold and unapproachable. A turned up foot is another sign of tension.
Shaking hands is a form of body language as well, and how you do it matters. You do not want to hold your palm up or down. If you shake hands with your palm up, you might be seen as being submissive. Shake with your palm down, and you are probably going to be labeled as controlling. Hold your hand in a neutral position (palm to palm) using about the same pressure as you would to hold a hammer as you shake.
| Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Steve_Papallo |
